PEOPLE I HATE IN COLLEGE

This blog is prompted by the Floss being a college student. Everyday the Floss sees groups of people that he accurately stereotypes. In this blog the Floss will give the reasons he hates these groups of people.

FAKE HIPPIES, HIPPIES, ANYONE ASSOCIATED WITH THEM

You all know these people, the ones who wear tie-dyed shirts for no reason. Some have dreadlocks, girls too. You look like a piece of shit. Honestly, if I was their parents I would be on suicide watch. They wear their Bob Marley t-shirts and listen to old 70's music and use words like "vintage". The girls don't care if they look ugly. Just a bad bad group of people.

HAND RAISERS

These are the slack jawwed faggots who raise their hand in classes to ask questions they know the answer to. The professor starts explaining the answer, and the hand raiser says, "O that's what I thought". These hand raisers are also really really eager to tell personal tales in class. I don't care what you learned in your high school English class. The hand raiser group is comprised mostly of dudes. They probably don't even watch sports.

4-SQUARE OR ANY OTHER CLUB THAT WAS LAST COOL IN MIDDLE SCHOOL

This group was prompted by the Floss having to walk through a common area of sorts where this group was blasting loud music and playing a game that was created in 4th grade. One of the kickballs actually rolled in the Floss' path. I picked it up and threw it back, but don't think I didn't want to Daniel Sepulveda that thing over the Cathedral. Other clubs that fall in this category: Magic Cards, Anime, etc.

GIRLS IN SWEATPANTS WITH UGG BOOTS

Just kidding. The best cold weather look for girls in the World. Even a not so hot chick with a decent butt can pull this look off. It's really a trend that should stick around for generations. You have to pray they wear a Northface coat with this look or you can't get a full view of the bum, and that's just not going to cut it.

THE PARANOID

These are the POS's that think they did bad on every test when they get an A every time. They call you up to check answers on homework worth .000005% of your grade. However, these kind of people aren't actually all that awful.

PHILLY FANS(only 90%)

You know who you are. The kids that come to the University of Pittsburgh and proceed to talk shit on our city. The start their E-A-G-L-E-S chants for no reason. They look like pricks. Not too mention that 75% of the wigger population at Pitt is from Philly(look it up). Go to Temple you angry, awful humans.

There are way way way more types of people to stereotype and hate. The Floss could really only think of this many for now. Greek's on TV and some bloggers have priorities. As always comments about who you love to hate and stereotype is welcomed with open arms.

ELECTION '08

I don't know who made the comment in the last comment section about who the Floss supports in the upcoming presidential election, but it was a very good question. However, this person clearly did not read the New Years Resolutions blog posted to start the new year. The Floss said he was going to try and not discuss the election once throughout the year. The Floss has kept up his promise until now because for the people the Floss will do it. Also, breaking promises is something the Floss loves doing.

WHO?

The Floss supports no one. Honestly, voting is something I might do just because this is the first presidential election of which I'm legal age. The Floss doesn't focus on the issues. When there's Pitt football and politics, there's really only Pitt football.

RANT

Really why should we all care so much about the election. Does the president really have much of a say in your everyday life? Most of us have to say no. Both presidents will believe in taxes. They are virtually the same person. Plus Congress makes all decisions anyways. People that get wrapped up in stuff like the election are MAC people. This was discussed yesterday amongst the readers of the Floss. MAC people are essentially hippies. They "go green". They eat organic foods. They eat Indian food. The MAC people all support Obama(this should give you a clue who the Floss semi-supports).

SARAH PALIN

Well when the Floss heard John McCain picked a woman running mate, he knew there had to be a reason. His reason, she's hot. I'm glad he decided not to focus on picking a qualified candidate, but picking great tits instead. Seriously, coolest election fact, t-minus 9 months til Sarah Palin is a GILF(granny I'd like to Floss). Honestly, the Floss couldn't pick Joe Biden out of a lineup, but he had to be more qualified than Palin. Palin was the governor of Alaska. Alaska and Hawaii are the fakest things ever. The US president(don't even know him) who added those 2 as States just decided that the flag looked dumb at 48 stars. I'm with him. Alaska is not real. It is just a piece of Canada. Hawaii hasn't given the US anything except Samoan football players. It also gave Colt Brennan a lot of weed.

THE CAROLINER

The Floss is unleashing his creative side in this blog. Today I sat at a 2 hour presentation on the new International Financial Reporting Standards. Yawn I know. I came up with 5 sandwiches while sitting there bored out of my mind. Here goes it:

START ME UP

The "Start Me Up" is a sandwich designed for the non egg liking folk like the Floss, but it could also be prepared with egg as well. First we start with 2 McDonald's McGriddle cakes because they are the best. However, for this sandwich we need to double the size of the cake. Working from the bottom up, we start out with a nice piece of canadian bacon or ham depending on your preference. Then we add a piece of American Cheese. Next up is a sausage patty. Cheese. Then we add a hash brown. Cheese. Top it off with some bacon. Syrup dipping sauce is optional. This could definitely be prepared at home or by a chain.

BCT

The BCT is actually not a sandwich but a taquito. It would be prepared by putting buffalo chicken dip on a taquito shell. We would also fire it up a bit with some diced jalepenos. Then bake that baby to a crisp. Queso and salsa for dipping. Perfect game time snack.

THE SOLUTION

Maybe this was just a problem for the Floss, but it doesn't change this dominant sandwich. The problem for the Floss was when tailgating I couldn't choose between kielbasa and grilled italian sausage. For this sandwich, we need a nice hoagie bun. You place the italian sausage right in the middle of the bun. Then you cut the kielbasa down the center. Then you take the kielbasa and form a little "kielbasa tent" over top of the sausage. Every bite will have both tastes. Other fixins for this would be optional. For me it would be raw onion and a shitload of ketchup. This is a great tailgating option. We could name this sandwich, "The Return of Pitt Football". Just a thought.

EASTER MONDAY

This sandwich was thought of because the Floss' love for ham. Everyone loves the leftover turkey sandwiches on the Friday after Thanksgiving. This year you can enjoy them while watching the Pitt Panthers take their second consecutive shit on the state of West Virginia. But back to the Easter Monday. We need a soft Kaiser bun for this. You top with some ham. Then you need a key ingredient, which is some sweet potatoes, preferably some mashed ones for sandwiching purposes. Then you add some grilled pineapple slices. No veggies needed on this bad boy. You could also add some BBQ sauce to increase the sweetness of this sandwich. Mmmmmm...

THE CAROLINER

The title of the blog. This was my favorite creation. Named in memory of CINC. It is a sandwich that he truly would love. First off you need a fork to eat this bad boy, which normally turns the Floss and others off, but not once you hear about this one. We need a biscuit to start this. Not a small biscuit. We need one 2.5 to 3 times the size of normal biscuits. We need some roided biscuits for this guy. Then we add a country fried steak to the bottom. Then a heaping scoop of mashed potatoes. Then another country fried steak on top of it. Sprinkle a half pound of shredded cheeses(cheddar and colby jack), then top it all off with some chicken gravy. This one is the Floss' favorite. Comments please. I'd like the readers to rank these in their favorite order.

HOW DRUNK WAS THE FLOSS LAST NIGHT?

Well he was drunk enough to borrow DROF's ID and get into Peter's Pub last night thanks to Pitt's own Dom Williams playing "guard" for Peter's Pub as well. Good to know he has a future as a guard at some level. Unlike previous Peter's experiences the Floss was virtually all alone. I entered with a friend, but not someone who the Floss really trusts. As we all know, the Floss' bar etiquette isn't exactly polished, but last night he was okay. Bought 2 pitchers for our table as a nice gesture. The Floss had a stacked wallet with 80 bones, but I didn't buy one shot. When I was sitting at my table, the Floss saw a girl that he was friends with. A very very hott girl. Once the Floss tried to serenade her with the great American classic, "The Sweet Escape" by Gwen Stefani. So the Floss went to talk to her. After the hello's and how you doin's, she goes, "your not 21 at all are you?". What a cunt. Not exactly something to say to the Floss. But then I came back with, "you aren't either". We agreed. So the Floss with his little bar etiquette offered to buy said female a shot. Her reply, "I have an exam at 8 AM tomorrow" and she peaced the convo. What a cunt. After that experience, and the fact that the bar was wall to wall, the Floss decided to go home and drink his patented Vlad and lemonade. Morale of the story: Not every night I go to the bar has to end in an elevator, only the good ones.

APOLOGEEZY

I debated an apology, but my thought was it would not go over well since the Floss just did apologize. Honestly every day that went by without an update hurt the Floss more than it did the fans. Many people would argue that the Floss is a blogger first and a student second, however that's not how MOF(mother of Floss) views it. The worst thing we can do is dwell on the past here(ask Dave Wannstedt). We need to focus on the future. Suggestions for blogs are always welcomed and encouraged. A couple late Thursday tidbits:

TODD THOMAS

Todd Thomas has joined the Pittsburgh Panthers family. He is the 13th player to commit in the '09 class. He is listed as a WR, but the Floss sees big things for him at safety. He will be a RS FR when Elijah Fields and the Dominator are SR's. Most people will say he has an offensive mentality, and it will be hard for him to move to defense. I disagree. Elijah Fields and Dom Decicco were both offensive studs in high school that have found their niche on defense.

GOLI GOLI GOLI

Alex Goligoski just scored his 2nd NHL goal right in front of my eyes. It was a Power Play goal just like his only other NHL goal. It wasn't pretty, but it is always nice to see players put the puck on net. As the saying goes, "you put the puck on net, good things happen".


FUCK RYAN FITZPATRICK

IN THE NAVY

Honestly, on Oct. 2nd at 11PM, I said I was angry we had a 16 day break. Honestly, it felt like the whole offseason all over again. Scary thing about that is...well we all know what happened our first game back. So with no further adoo...

WHY PITT WILL BEAT NAVY BY 14+...

-Shady McCoy. He torched them last year and he will do it again. Shady just needs to hold onto the rock against Navy. He's sooooo hot right now too. Feelin' 2 Bills outta Shady Saturday.

-Billy the Kid. Pat Bostick threw all over this team last year. There is no doubt Bill can pass on Navy when we need him too Saturday. It will also help Billy that Shady will set up play action and short distance passing downs. All QB's are better in short yardage downs.

-Jonathan Baldwin. I have compared him to Larry Legend ever since he chose the Panthers. Larry had a big game in week 2 against A&M, but then didn't really break out until around game 5. JB had his coming out party last week, and he will now turn into a ridiculous talent. Navy's starting corners are 5'7 and 6'0 tall. JB is 6'6. (giggling)

-Scott McKillop. People are giving him the respect he deserves finally. All he ever does is step up in big games. People are saying 15+ tackles. I see it too.

-Corners. Jovani Chappel and AB are both very very solid tacklers. This is huge when playing a team like Navy. They should be able to contain the outside sweeps of Navy.

-Revenge. Don't think this team forgot about last years embarassing nationally televised loss to Navy. This might actually be the biggest factor.

WHY NAVY MIGHT HANG CLOSE FOR A WHILE...

-Homecoming. Homecoming fires up everyone. Navy has a very passionate fan base. The game will be a sell out of 34,000 fans. However, people are projecting near 8,000 Pitt fans. 8,000 Pitt fans would be unreal. Can't wait to hear Let's Go Pitt chants.

-Defensive Ends. The DE's are excellent pass rushers, but they do have trouble keeping contain on the ends. They need to play at home. Hopefully the 2 weeks has also given our players a chance to get used to cut blocking.

-Kaipo. Kaipo owned us last year. He is a scary player to think about. He can run that offense to perfection.

-Wanny. If Wanny doesn't know how to stop their offense in year 2, he better take a long hard look in the mirror. He brought up stopping the Oklahoma teams back in the day. How couldn't he stop this Navy O? The spread is way harder to defend than the triple option, but Wanny seems to have a decent grasp of the spread. Example No. 133351324245 of why Dave Wannstedt doesn't make sense.

FLOSSIN' PREDICTION

P-I-T-T 35

NAVY 17

HAIL TO PITT

SORRY

The Floss is in a good mood and wants to start drinking, so sorry for the lack of update. Here's a YouTube gem by someone with way too much time on his hand. The man who put this together is a great American, and he should be commended. Probably not work safe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LjF3MfXRFo&feature=related

RANT RANT RANT

Hello? Where are the fans? Weak participation by the fans since the Floss' illustrious return to the free World. The fans are what get me to this computer in the morning to come help make your day a little more enjoyable. Daily Flossin' is good for everyone, but some much needed love this way is in order. Come on people. The Floss did receive a text today from a new reader(Mr. Shenanigans) stating "I'm reading the floss and it is the greatest thing I have ever seen. Already bookmarked it on my favorites". The fans were going to get a ton of heat today, until that text came in this morning.

CARPE DIEM

Seize the Day(or season). If you haven't looked at the current make-up of the AFC, look again. The Steelers aren't showing the sense of urgency that they need to considering the circumstances. The AFC is as ripe as Hannah Montana for the Steelers' taking. Honestly, the Titans are 5-0. Their QB is Kerry Collins. Kerry Collins, we can beat him. Collins isn't exactly Tom Terrific or Peyton. Next in the list of AFC contenders are the Buffalo Thrills. While they are a nice story, Coach T and the boys can't be shaking in their boots about playin' Trent Edwards or J.P. Losman. The Denver Broncos have absolutely 0 defense. Peyton isn't healthy. Jacksonville is struggling, San Diego sucks. Matt Cassel ain't beatin us, neither is Joey Flacco(maybe in a few year). The AFC is yours Ben. Just fuckin' take it. Grab the AFC by the balls and win this thing. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't mind a trip to the Super Bowl. Let's go...

GOING GREEN

Honestly, going green is the newest most annoying fad ever. Like honestly, everyone tries to push going green on you now a days. This really pissed me off at the Steelers' game last Monday, when the Steelers' had their "Green Tip of the Day". The tip: Use less water by taking short showers, no baths(Floss doesn't like baths), and don't leave the water running while you brush your teeth. Other tips include things like re-using towels to reduce water used while washing clothes. Seriously, Americans used to be able to get by with just not littering. They want us to do the dumbest things in this Going Green campaign. I hate it. Isn't this another instance where common sense can prevail. You don't need to push people to do things that they already know what to do. They should start putting tips like, "you can't afford a 400,000 dollar house if you live on a mailman's salary(Karl Malone excluded)", because the market is a helluva lot more important than the Earth's history 1,000,000,000,000,000 years from now.