Monday, March 31, 2008

FINAL THOUGHTS

The weekend has came and went. I finally came to grips with what I will remember from the Pitt basketball season. I will remember the Big East Tournament, not what could have been. You could dwell on the fact that Pitt was outplayed in their 2nd round game against Michigan St, but the Floss will not be. Even if Pitt wins that game, they would have lost to Memphis, who is playing the best basketball in the country right now, even better than Rock Chalk, UCLA, and UNC(but barely). Memphis is playing like a well oiled machine right now and is the Floss' pick to win it all at this point. So in retrospect, maybe WVU and 'Nova got one more win in the tourney this year, and Louisville 2, I'm taking our title and being happy with it. Next year, if Sam I AM comes back, we should make a legit final 4 run.

PIRATES SEASON OPENER

If you hear crickets, thats because no one is talking about the Pirates season opener. For the first time in the Floss' life, he didn't give a rat's ass about the Pirates season starting. I fully expect this team to lose 95 plus games this year, but I did think about a positive thing about the Pirates. This might be their best starting pitching rotation in a while. Snell and Gorzo are legit NL starters, Maholm and Duke have shown that they can be major league starters, and Matt Morris might have something left in the tank. If all the pitchers play well this season and the position players all have career years, theres no reason to think we can't win 84 games. My excitement for the season is currently at a 2 out of 10, hopefully that changes. Floss' prediction for tonight...I will be watching Pens-Rangers on Versus.

AND THEN THERE WERE 3

WOW. Last night was the best ROL all season. The drama really unfolded last night. Daisy proved her craziness again with her abortion, 2 year abstinence, dancing job, and her previous affairs with a guitarist from Poison. The most shocking part about last night's episode was that she didn't get the boot. Let me go one by one on the Daisy issues...

ABORTION- I felt legitimately bad that she had to reveal this on television. This may have been the first revelation of an abortion on a reality show.
2 YEAR ABSTINENCE AND DANCING JOB- These two are linked perfectly. Honestly, as a huge strip club afficianado, the Floss cannot believe this. Who would have ever believed that any stripper was abstinent? She's a liar. In the perfect world, strippers have sex every night with a customer. The Floss just doesn't have the funds. This is my theory, strippers have sex for money, dancing is just a cover. God damnit. Even if you don't believe my theory, just look at Daisy. In 2 years, a girl as trashy as that hasn't let a man get lucky. She also has plastic surgery and a boob job. I just don't understand how she could possibly keep her legs closed for 2 years. Why continually lie to Bret? It's like lying to God.
CC-Yeah, she never hung out with him. Good lie there. Bret could probably ask CC right now and he could out her lying ass. However, CC probably wouldn't remember one groupie from all the years of drugs and rock n' roll.

How about Bret also called her one of the hottest groupies he has seen? Bullshit Bret. She probably couldn't place top 5 backstage on any given night.

Onto the rest of the episode...Destiney is annoying and a big fat C word. She can't continually be that big of a bitch and stay high in the power rankings. I still like her as the winner though, sadly. She sucks. The Heather of season 2. Ambre is starting to show her tough side, and the Floss loves it. Her attitude is becoming sexier by the minute. The only problem with Ambre is that she originally lied to Bret and it is outed that she is actually 37. I couldn't get over that she was 32. Ouch, 37, that's old. The new fav.

Jessica...ah Jessica. It was really for the best that she didn't make it to the finals, but of all the weeks for Bret to do it, this wasn't the week. Jessica puts in her best episode yet. Who knew she was the next Anika Sorrenstam? It was also funny when she said she played four years of varsity golf in high school. The Floss was thinking that she graduated like 3 years ago and wouldn't be too rusty. On an episode where she showed her sanity, skill set, and sexiness, Bret gives her the boot. Honestly, the Floss was super disappointed in Bret for this, leading me to my next theory...

Bret doesn't want a non-violated girl, he doesn't want to be guy number 4 or 5, he wants to be guy number 2,246 or 2,247. The conclusion from this theory is that Bret doesn't want commitment from these girls. Another conclusion the Floss draws from this theory is that Bret reads the Floss and that we are on the same page. He saw my hopeful prediction that he will become the next Hef. He also saw that everyone wants more ROL's. Bret buddy, I got you.

POWER RANKINGS GOIN' INTO THE FINALS

24-Daisy
17-Destiney
1-Ambre

Monday, March 24, 2008

FOLLOW UP: I WANT TO SUCK YOUR BLOOD (PART 2)

First, for the new fans of the Floss, stop reading right now and go back and read Thursday January 24th's blog entitled "I WANT TO SUCK YOUR BLOOD".







Well, today was another blood drive at the University of Pittsburgh. The Floss has been debating whether or not to try to donate at this blood drive, just for blog value. Forget the saving lives, the Floss wanted a blog. I mustered up my courage enough to go to the blood drive today. Immediately when I arrived, I saw 3 of the BSV's smoking cigs on the patio outside the Union. Great, more cigarette smoke. I really did almost walk away. They were actually what was described about BSV's, 25 to 45, definitely single, trashy, ugly, lung cancer, etc. Not a good sign. The Floss did not stop at the door, he made it all the way inside. First things first, sign in, say I haven't had sex with an African Male in the last 27 years, that I never had mad cow disease, never went outside of the US and Canada(what is so clean about Canada that it is on our level), and most importantly have not been pregnant in the past 6 months. After the preliminary screening, the Floss made the one on one interview. The BSV who interviewed me was one of the cigarette smoking BSV's. Not a good start for the Floss. Well the one on one interview could be compared to the NFL Combine. You had to pass their series of tests to make the cut for the blood sucking table. I passed the "Eyyyyerrroon" Test, gotta love the yinzer in this BSV. Next was the pulse test, rocked that one somehow in my nervous state. The last test was the one I was certainly going to fail, blood pressure test. First, the Floss has family history of high blood pressure, plus I eat everything greasy, cheesy, meaty, syrupy and haven't exercised since the Backyard Brawl. Compare the Floss in a blood pressure test to Casey Hampton in his first sprint test of the season. BUT, shockingly I passed again. Now it was no looking back, we were goin' to one of the tables, getting the blood sucked out...




To set it up for you, there are 4 tables and 6 BSV's. All tables empty, all BSV's un-occupied. The Floss had a BIG decision to make. Here's a break down of what the BSV's were lookin' like. We had 2 young, trashy, beautiful(in BSV standards), 20-somethings. Then there were 2 very trashy, goth looking, nose-ring wearing, black eye liner streaks, just nothing good about these 2 BSV's. Then we had a motherly looking woman, probably 40's, definitely the most experienced BSV. Lastly, there was a guy. If I'm getting my blood sucked, definitely going to be a girl BSV. The Floss had it narrowed down to 2 final choices, the mother woman and the cuter less-trashy 20-something BSV. Well we all know who I chose...

So, the woman about to suck my blood's name was Christina. She asked me if I had any problems giving blood before. Naturally I told her about how uneasy I was with the whole blood sucking thing. Naturally in her cute BSV tone, she said she would take good care of me. Christina reassured the Floss, the trust was unbelievable in our relationship. First she tried to find the vein in my left arm. All of her poking and prodding(hands not needle) at my fatty arm was to no avail as she could not find the vein, so she asked for my right arm. I was very nervous in the short run about her sucking blood from my right arm because I thought it would make my writing arm very sore for the day. But for Christina, I was down. After some more of her rubbing my arm(great foreplay), she found the vein and got rough with me. Christina started up my arm's iodine bath in preparation for the needle being driven in my arm. The time had come, needle time...

So the Floss closed his eyes as always with needles, and I felt the normal sting of a needle. This didn't hurt any more or less than any other needle incident. That was it, basically. It didn't hurt, the blood flowed out like a river, everything according to plan. She ended our relationship earlier than I would have liked, but Christina still has to be the MVP of BSV's. Now if there is one good BSV, does that mean there are more? No probably not, I'm just glad that I saved 3 lives.


ROL UPDATE

Since I have not fully grasped the magnitude or importance of the Pitt loss I will wait a little to write about it. I also can't talk about the team atop the Atlantic because we know how that goes. Since I haven't blogged in a while, I figure I can give a ROL update.

First off, a Happy Belated Easter to all. Since the Floss will be eating leftover ham sandwiches for at least a week, I'm still celebrating the bunny's arrival. Now for the episode. Personally, I wasn't impressed. The Floss was and still is a HUGE HEATHER HATER. She sucks. Period. I don't care if she combines the 2 fine arts of alcoholism and stripping, I just don't like her. I was sick of hearing, "I just wanna get the dirt on these girls". The only reason Bret brought her back is because he was sick of not having sex with the girls this season(Heather is definitely one of his go-to bangs when he can't score random play). Bret has refrained himself much more this season because of the heat he took last time. I think he may have only went past kissing with just Daisy(probably went all the way there). Maybe a little bj/hj action with Krazy Joe while she was still around. If he banged her, she would still be there. Back to the episode, the ex boyfriends were a terrible addition. They gave away nothing. The best was easily Ambre's weirdo friend. Honestly, if that is Ambre's best friend, how in the living hell could Bret date her? Seriously, unless Bret gives up rock and roll for Scrabble tourney's Ambre is dunzo. The other ex's just plained sucked. No big secrets came out other than Daisy's mild secret. Her secret wasn't nearly as shocking as Krazy Joe still being married. By Jessica getting blackout drunk, she ruined her chance too. Bret knows she couldn't handle partying on the road. I think last night's episode actually eliminated 2 contestants(Megan too) and left us with a 2 horse race. The 2 horses would be Destiney and Daisy. The Floss was on the Destiney bandwagon day one. I also predicted a long run for Daisy. Ambre and Jessica are going to provide a nice argument for cute vs. evil. I'm gonna say right now the finals are going to be Destiney and Ambre. Bret went with the sweet girl in season one, going with the crazy rocker in season two. Enough with the Floss' predictions. Here are the Power Rankings for the Final 4:
4. Daisy--don't like her, just don't really like her.
3. Jessica--I don't want her making the finals, would be a crushing loss. Trying to get off the drug that is Jessica.
2. Ambre--Too Old. Too lame. Still floats the Floss' boat.
1. Destiney--Many people hate her, I love her, and her cans.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

FLOSS' FIRST ROUND SELECTIONS

EAST

North Carolina OVER The Mount
Arkansas OVER Eric Gordon and DJ White
Notre Lame OVER George Mason
Washington St. OVER Winthrop
St. Joes OVER Oklahoma
Louisville OVER Jared Zabransky
South Alabama OVER The Butler
Tennessee OVER America

MIDWEST

Kansas OVER Portland St. Pilots(great name)
Mike Mckee and Kent St. OVER UNLV(no more LJ)
Clemson OVER Villanova
***Siena OVER Vandy
Mayo OVER Beasley
Wisconsin OVER Cal St. Fullerton
Gonzaga OVER Andrew Davidson
Georgetown OVER UMBC Retrievers(great name)

DIRTY SOUTH(DIRTY B/C OF THE PANTHERS)

Memphis OVER UTArl
Oregon OVER Miss. St.
Michigan St. OVER Temple
PITT OVER ORU
Marquettte OVER Kentucky
Lopez Twins OVER Cornell Big Red(great name)
St. Paddy Mills OVER Da U
Texas OVER Stone Cold Steve "Austin Peay"

WEST

UCLA OVER Jerry Rice
BYU OVER TAMU
***Western Kentucky OVER Drake
UConn OVER San Diego
Purdue OVER Baylor
X OVER Georgia(still pullin for Dennis Felton)
Arizona OVER WVU(eff Thuggy Bear)
Duke OVER Belmont

OSU OVER MICHIGAN, PENN ST., AND OREGON

We all know that today, the nation's most hated high school athlete ever picked The Ohio St. Buckeyes over Michigan, Penn St., and Oregon. In other words, Ohio St. doled out the most money. I heard OSU offered the merchandising rights to the Columbus Clippers(AAA Baseball Team) and the Columbus Blue Jackets and a cool 500 G's. Seriously someone needs to point out that Maurice Clarett outted tOSU boosters a long time ago. You think Jimmy Sweater Vest doesn't know about this? Wouldn't it be great if Pryor landed in a huge scandal over this? That would be awesome.

Enough about Pryor. Test at 1 tomorrow. Back at the apartment at approx. 1:53. First Shot of Old Crow 1:54. Eighth shot of Crow, 2:03. PITT OVER ORU, approx 5PM.

Seriously everyone please enjoy the next two days. These are quite possibly the two best sports days of the year. Seriously, even women LOVE the NCAA tourney. Bracket Pools are seriously MOF(Mother of Floss' favorite thing in the World). She has Georgia in the Sweet 16. I didn't say she was good at it.

In being "giddy" over the NCAA tourney.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

TUESDAY TITTIES

WOW. That is really the only way to start up this blog. I never thought the Panthers were in real danger of missing the NCAA Tourney, but I didn't reallistically see this coming. I predicted 3 out of the Final 4 of the BE tourney correct and accurately predicted the championship, but the Floss was just having a good day. Did I think the best might be yet to come for the Panthers? Yes, I thought this was possible, maybe a 10% possibility. Watching this BE tourney was like having Christmas 4 days in a row and getting your favorite present ever each day. FYI, Floss' favorite Christmas presents, SHAQ Mini-Hoop, Bike(what the hell was I thinking), and a WWF ring with the courtside press table(however, wrestling died a LONG time ago, sorry DDP(L) and PnR). This BE tourney has created some bandwagon jumpers for the Panthers, now if this only leads to some recruits(Dante Taylor, Kevin Parrom, Duran Scott come on down). Some Pitt thoughts.

APOLOGY

First off, the Floss would like to issue a formal blog apology to Ronald Ramon. However, if you go back and read the last post, I said he could completely reconcile with a good performance in the BE tourney and the NCAA tourney. I was not always a Ramon hater. I pushed for him to start at the beginning of the year when PnR was hatin' on Razor, but he just let me down. I have bought into the fact that Ramon needs to play off the ball, and when Fields sets him up, he can be that 45% 3 point threat that we all know and love. He also completely validated his career, no matter what happens in the NCAA tourney(Ron don't quit now though buddy). I will always remember this class of seniors for this BE title run(hopefully a deep NCAA run). Keith Benjamin didn't do much statistically in the tourney, but he was all over the glass in the title game and he had a few great assists. I will have to remember Mike Cook for being a glue guy, but it was great to see him hoist the trophy with the team and cheer after mostly every basket. So to you Mr. Ramon, I say sorry. To the rest of you seniors(Mo Polen, National Anthem and your 3 points against DePaul) I just say thank you for this memorable run to the BE title.

SAM I AM

I hate this nickname, but it fits and I love it. The Silent Assassin was a nickname of a few players before, but this nickname could also fit for Sam Young. He is always quiet when he puts in his 20 point games. He also doesn't get too fired up on the court. In the Floss' playing days, he was a fiery guy, but on this team of loud mouths(DeJuan and Levance), it is nice to have your best player be a quiet guy. I would also like to remove Chris Taft from my All-Time(er sort of) team and replace him with Sam Young. I never thought he was clutch or consistent, but I was wrong(common theme here). Sam I Am is ready for the L, but I want him to stay. Really, it isn't in his best interest to stay at Pitt for his senior season, but why not? Maybe, he is unlike selfish, greedy athletes and wants other things with his career. Maybe Sam wants another BE Title and MOP in the BE tourney, maybe he wants National POY or at least consideration, maybe he wants a National Championship(he wins it this year, he can bolt), maybe he wants the BE MVP next year? Hell, maybe he just likes playing with these guys.

B SQUARED

The B Squred refers to 6 and 7 on the Panthers, Brown and Biggs. Talk about bringing your A-Game, which all the Panthers did, but especially these two. Two of the more inconsistent Panthers much of the season stepped up HUGE in MSG in those 4 days. Brown provided scoring when needed, twice going into double figures. He also had the steal that locked up the Louisville game, when he ripped the ball away from Earl Clark under the Louisville hoop. If he plays like this in the tourney, I'm going to fall in love with him more. But maybe an even bigger hero in the Panthers tourney title run was Tyrell Biggs. He went from not being trusted, to being the end of game defender. He stays grounded and switches on ball screens much better than DeJuan. He finally realized that he is a wide body and should be a good rebounder. He was simply AWESOME in the title game versus Georgetown. He was a force on the glass. Biggs might finally have mastered his jump shot. Or at least figured that it is much easier to hit a 12 to 15 foot jumper than stepping back past 18 for a 3. I will never again call him Tyrell Littles.

BOBBY KNIGHT

While Knight's Insights is possibly the worst SportsCenter segment ever, him as an analyst is great. I predict his career as an analyst will last at max another year because he will either blow up on TV or take another coaching job(more likely). He knows more about the game than any other analyst ESPN wants to put out there(maybe outside of Bilas, Emmy Nominee, you know this if you watched any early game last week). He also puts Digger in his place enough that it gives him value. He literally frightens Digger Phelps. Digger waits for his turn to speak when Knight is on the set with him. It is awesome. What is Knight's best redeeming quality? Duh, He picked Pitt to win the National Title. If you could have seen the celebration in the room when he picked that. It was a 13-9 esque celebration between SpiderWeb(first ever shoutout for the biggest fan of Pitt hoops), FOF, B Man, PnR, and yours truly.

BASEBALL

Sadly, baseball is going to come and steal the spotlight from hockey in somewhere around 10 days. It's the least wonderful time of the year. Wake me up in October.

LOS PENGUINOS

Way down on the Floss' list this week because they don't like the spotlight on here. Is there a hotter team in hockey right now than the Pens? Maybe the Rangers, who are going to get a wake up call in 15 minutes from the coolest team in the NHL. By the way eff Jagr, Geno and Gonch are my 2 favorite Russians. 14 goals in there last 2 games. Congrats to Hal Gill for being the man. Also congrats to Hossa for his first goal in black and gold. Think of the possibilities when Sid is fully healthy. Scary is the only word to describe this team.

ROL UPDATE

Hey your a krazy bitch, but you **** so good I'm on top of it. Just some song lyrics, since Krazy Joe has finally left the best show on TV. Thank God. Megan, your next, you awful awful person. I want to know if Bret put an act on to piss off the other girls and America with his known affection for Krazy Joe. I think yes, just because he loves none of them. Other thoughts from this week:
-Jessica in schoolgirl outfit, yummy
-Daisy, really you couldn't buy a better face?
-Destiney needs to drop the bitch card, remember when she was sweet and sexy for like the first 4 episodes. Still a Floss Fav.
-Bret knows Megan isn't in to him, great for everyone involved.
-Ambre, 32, really, a little too old for the Floss, and probably Bret. She looked bad this week too. :(

Power Ranking the Final 5:
1. Jessica--the hype is real
2. Destiney--still pulling for you, just leave the darkside
3. Ambre--32? Can't really get over that one. I just thought a mature 27.
4. Daisy--Too dumb, really can't get over that.
5. Megan--Somehow she is gonna cunt her way into the final 3, and it pisses me off.

ST. PATRICK'S DAY

After almost backing out of St. Patrick's day celebration for the 3rd year in a row, the Floss partook this year. However, I would like to say I was not at full game level. The Pitt basketball win Friday night kept me awake way too long, which led to not enough sleep. The impending title game kept me thinking ahead. The crowd was a little old for me outside of B Man and COF(Really I heard about wedding plans, come on, not a drinking environment). The Irish Carbomb nearly made me vomit. All factors that led to a relatively average St. Patricks Day. Really the whole problem I have with the day is the fear of a UDA(Underage Drinking Arrest). Being a mature 19 sucks because I can function in a bar scene(laugh), but my age holds me back. Sadly again, the Floss will be a mature 20 next year, and again might not completely enjoy himself. :(. A big props to Aimin' for Failure and Jah Banni for a great party though. People do really like them.

LETS GO PENS

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

MAILBAG: IT'S FOR THE KIDS

A first for the Floss. His first mailbag. The way this works is, I take e-mails from actual readers and I answer their questions as only the Floss can. Remember these are actual e-mails from actual readers.

(crying) Why do you hate me so much? Is it because of my ugly haircut?
--Ronald Ramon, SG, Pitt Panthers

Well Ronny, if you remember back to your sophomore year, you were my favorite player. The real reason was that my Jaron Brown jersey now could be played off as yours. I thought this was cool up til this season when you have completely insulted the number 4(church-league number of Floss). If you would just make one effing big game shot(WVU=blind squirrel finding a nut) or just play like you did as a freshman and sophomore, I wouldn't be so hostile towards you. The good news is, the Floss forgives, make some shots in the upcoming tourneys. We can re-evaluate where you stand after that. Your hair is embarassing however.

Where should I go to college?
--Terrelle Pryor

Since Tino the Dreamboat is on-board at Pitt for the next 4-5 years, you can take your talents elsewhere. I have said since day one that you were going to be a Nitter. I hope I'm wrong and you shouldn't let JayPa coach you. You also need to make a decision by April 1st. My best guess for what you should do, is enter the baseball draft. You need all the hype you can get.

Are you ever going to come and eat the 3LB burger? Clearfield, PA is waiting. All we have to wait for is the Floss and Penn St. football.
--Denny from Denny's Beer Barrel Pub

Honestly, friends/family of the Floss, if we can get you on board, I'm gonna take down this burger. I have never been so ready for something in my life. I'm in playing shape right now, we just need you, the fans to help me out here.

You drinking with me Saturday? Parade?
--St. Patrick

New Year's Resolution blog. The Floss will effin be there. All he wants to know is if the throwdown with Aimin for Failure and Jah Banni is happening. I wanna go up to Mt. Waershingtun and booze at 7AM, who doesn't?

Yo Floss, you wanna make a guest appearance on ROL 12? Hit me up. Ayo.
--Bret Michaels

(Crying) A dream come true. We both know there is no end to your groupie ass in the future. I would love to be there for ROL 12. Bret, we both know that you can slay any of the remaining girls. The key is to find the one who will not commit. You did it the first time, do it again.

My boobs are not real, but I love them just the same.
--Natalie(Girlicious)

Not a surprise here. The Floss loves them as well. Thanks for clearing that up.

Did you see the bottom line today on ESPN sweetie? San Antonio has signed me through 2011. Our love will have to wait 3 more years.
--Becky Hammon

For the first time ever, something in women's athletics was relevant enough for the bottom ticker. However Becky, by 2010 we can only hope the WNBA contracts and you can come be the trophy wife God intended you to be. Love, The Floss.

Remember to e-mail your questions for the next Floss.

SOME HARDWOOD TO GIVE OUT AND THE BE TOURNEY

The Floss is in a good mood today, so an update is in order. The Floss had an interview this morning(Business Floss was in full gear), which basically ends all the important things he needs to do on Spring Break Murrysville. Now it's on to drinking, watching copious amounts of basketball, and eating so much food that the 3LB burger will be mine in the summer months. I couldn't think of a better update for today than to give my end of the year college basketball awards. These are actually national awards, I will focus on a team other than Pitt, shocker.



MVP: The Floss comes from the school of winning. This is a 2 horse race between Psycho T and Michael Beasley. Tyler Hansbrough averages 23.1 pts. and 10.5 reb. a game, while Michael Beasley averages 26.5 pts. and 12.5 reb. a game. Truly the numbers are quite similar with the difference being that Psycho T led his team to a number one overall ranking, while Ty Lawson was injured. Again going with the winner, even if he plays for Roy Williams(2nd least favorite coach to Calhoun for the Floss)

MVP: TYLER HANSBROUGH

COACH OF THE YEAR: Note: I did very minimal research and actually have no idea who will win these awards in the eyes of the media. To the Floss, this was a wide open race. I will give you a list of finalists and then break down who the winner and runner up is. The List(Top 5, no order)

Coach K--This Duke team lacks size and is definitely not as talented as their record.

Ron Everheart--I'm giving him some local love. This team had 3 wins 2 years ago. They also went through the tragedy of 6 players getting shot. He has 17 wins in a above average conference.

Keno Davis--Drake was predicted 7th in the MVC at the start of the year. They went 15-3 in league, won the conference tourney(champ game by 30) and finished a sizzling 28-4. (google "Drake Basketball Coach", it asks you if you meant "Duke's Basketball Coach", lol)

Bruce Pearl--The Orange suit went 28-3 this year and won the game at Memphis. One of the Floss' favorite teams. Final 4. Lock it up.

John Calipari--Some Pitt lovin', even though he did poorly at Pitt, Floss still respects the man, and his 30-1 record.

COACH: KENO DAVIS(His star player is Adam Emmenecker, and he wins 28 games)

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR: I'm not going to waste your time with this one. It's Beasley enough said. Does any stud player need a nickname more than Michael Beasley? I'm thinking something thug, because of him getting kicked out of Oak Hill and respecting Bob THuggins. If I was creative I would give him one.

ROOKIE: MICHAEL BEASLEY

1ST TEAM ALL AMERICANS: Unlike the Big East who announced 11 on their first team, the Floss will go with the traditional 5. As always, very biased picks.
C: TYLER HANSBROUGH
PF: BROOK LOPEZ
SF: MICHAEL BEASLEY
SG: CHRIS DOUGLAS-ROBERTS
PG: D.J. AUGUSTIN

Now on to some fun awards for the season.

BEST DRESSED COACH: SIDNEY LOWE. Bruce Pearl in a close 2nd for that orange blazer that he likes to don. Pitino should get votes, but since the Diet Pepsi ruined the suit for the 2nd half, he loses. When he puts on that big red sports coat, he looks like Clifford the Big Red Dog. I just love the jacket. I really do. I feel like if there was a Polish Day instead of St. Patrick's Day I would want to own that coat.

OLSEN AWARD: LOPEZ TWINS. I just really like the Lopez twins. I've even developed a mini-man-crush on them. Stanford is a team to root for in the tourney. They do not have much talent other than Brook Lopez. Twins are also the gayest story line in the NCAA tourney, barely ahead of cousins and brothers. Since it was so gay, and the Floss has a mini-man-crush, why not an award?

WHAT DID I GET MYSELF INTO AWARD?: TIE--RICK MAJERUS AND TOMMY AMAKER. Majerus was a good coach, so he figured he could take a team in a weaker conference and compete. Wrong. After watching them get run out of the gym by Duquesne, not too mention scoring 20 pts in a whole basketball game, Rick must wonder why he gave up on ESPN. Honestly, the buffets must have switched to the Atkins diet or something for him to have left. Tommy Amaker was a worthless coach at Michigan, who decided to try and make a name for himself at Harvard. Harvard? Really, come on. Then he locks up a top 25 recruiting class. Did he really not expect investigations? He is effed three ways til tomorrow when all his violations come out.

THE ALL WHITE MAN TEAM: This team could take me to a title easy. I love this team with all my heart.

C: TYLER HANSBROUGH
PF: KEVIN LOVE
SF: CHASE BUDDINGER
SG: A.J. GRAVES
PG: GREG PAULUS

The best part about this team is off the bench we have Luke Harangody, Jon Brockman, A.J. Ogilivy, Kyle Singler, and Jon Scheyer. This was all off the top of my head. Props to the white man.

Enough with awards. Now it is time to show off the BE Tourney bracket that the Floss is taking.

FIRST ROUND WINNERS: CUSE, PROVIDENCE, MARQUETTE, PITT
SECOND ROUND WINNERS: GTOWN, UCONN, MARQUETTE, PITT
SEMI-WINNERS: GTOWN, PITT
CHAMPIONS: PITT

You would have to be high to think that with me in a good mood that I wasn't picking Pitt all the way in this one. Also notice WVU goin down tomorrow against Providence. I truly think that could happen.

Friday, March 7, 2008

THE SQUAD

The Pens 5-2 loss was an awful one to watch last night. A day after being praised by the Floss, Marc Andre Fleury played like a flower. He gave up 3 goals in the first period, 2 of which were his fault. He played the puck too much and poorly when he did. He still can't control a rebound, and Bob Errey let us know 344,000 times last night. All in all a bad game, coupled with a 3 goal 3 period win for Montreal, it was a bad night for the Pens. Safe to say they won't get a top blog position or a title for a while. Hey, at least Sid has a 2 game point streak since his return.



ALL TIME(ER SORT OF) PITT TEAM

I was pondering this question all week, even discussing it with friends, I wanted to make the all-time Pitt team(er sort of). Really my Pitt basketball fandom started when Brandin Knight took us to the tourney in the '01-'02 season. So here we sit in 2008, about to embark on our 7th consecutive NCAA tournament berth. These last 7 years have been fun and frustrating for all Pitt basketball fans. Historically a football school, Ben Howland put the Pitt Panthers basketball squad back on the map. In 4 out of the 6 years that have been completed, the Panthers have lost in the Sweet 16, which sucks, but it is also a nice accomplishment. We have been spoiled recently and the Floss wanted to look back on what will be considered one of the strongest time periods of Pitt hoops. For nostalgic value, I am going to give my all-time starting 5+1 for the last 7 years.



PG: The strongest position in the Floss' opinion over these last seven years was the point guard position. It made the choice at the point guard position very tough for the Floss. The three candidates in contention are Brandin Knight, Carl Krauser, and Levance Fields. Knight led us to the first two Sweet 16's, but he was not a clutch player. Fields has only had one solid season under his belt, but he had the clutch factor. Compare Knight's 50% free throw shooting to Field's near 80%. Not too mention Le Le can hit the 3 ball with more regularity. Carl Krauser was the best scorer of the bunch, but he never seemed to have the whole team playing at his speed. So really it comes down to Fields and Knight. Fields still has a year left of playing the college level plus a chance to take Pitt on a tourney run this year. The Floss has to go with Brandin Knight here. He led us to 2 Sweet 16's plus he led us to our only BE tourney title in those years.

WINNER: BRANDIN KNIGHT

SG: The weakest position over the last seven years is the shooting guard position. If Keith Benjamin had played two years like he has for the majority of this season, he would have this spot locked up. Antonio Graves never averaged over 10 points a game in his career, a fact the Floss did not know about until about 3 minutes ago. Julius Page still averaged 11 points a game in his miserable senior campaign when he was supposed to be the star. However, when he played with Brandin Knight he was much better. Since he is playing with Knight on this team, I guess he is an even more obvious choice. Note: Ronald Ramon was never even given consideration.

WINNER: JULIUS PAGE

SF: Many ways to go with this position. Since Pitt currently starts 3 guards all under 6'2, you could make a case for many traditional 2 guards. You could also put Sam Young into his NBA position here. If Mike Cook played this whole year, he might have been a perfect player to play alongside Knight and JP1. However, the Floss boiled this decision down to two players, Jaron Brown and Sam Young. Jaron Brown will be the Floss' favorite Pitt player for many many years to come. He was the glue guy. He would go out and lead the team in rebounds and assists. He put in 10 points a game plus those intangible stats like 5 reb, 5 assts, 2 steals, and a block. Sam Young however has developed into a scorer, which is something Pitt has lacked in these 7 years. The only scorer in crunch minutes over these years has been "Black Magic" Carl Krauser(and to an extent Fields). Sam Young has been called out by Fields and Dixon recently for whining and such. The Floss has cut him a break all year because he has been the straw that stirs the drink(under-used sports analogy) all year for the Panthers. I do see that lack of intensity when it comes to Sam Young. Maybe he can prove me wrong in the tourney. Just don't take your shoes off like that smelly Lithuianian jerkoff Donatas Zavackas. Needless to say, the Floss is taking the winner.

WINNER: JARON BROWN

PF: Sam Young could technically be picked again here at the 4-spot, but there are 2 way more qualified players for this spot. Those two would be Chris Taft and Chevon Troutman. Taft only played two years before jumping ship to the NBA(nice one Chris) and Chevy was a beast for all four years at Pitt. Chevy was a PA kid, who more old men loved than any Pitt player in recent memory. The reason old men loved him; shoots over 60% from the floor, gets rebounds, always happy, not cocky, just an all around class act. However, Chris Taft was a special talent. Taft averaged near double-doubles in both his freshman and sophomore years. He was close to Troutman in production. It is scary to think what he might have been had he stayed even an extra year. Since this All-Star team gets an extra year, Taft is the Floss' eventual pick here. Taft was a player that could lead you to a title, Troutman was in the glue guy mold. We already have a glue guy, Jaron Brown. Sorry Chevy, more on you later. Interesting that Taft is the first player to not play with Brandin Knight, another reason I would love to see this team.

WINNER: CHRIS TAFT

C: Since I didn't pick Troutman at the 4 and Taft at the 5, the readers should realize that the Floss is going with someone bigger than 6'10 Chris Taft. Before all of you cringe out there, I'm going to justify the pick of Aaron Gray. First off, he is a matchup problem for any team, especially with Taft on the other block. Second, he is a solid rebounder. Before people start making the Blair argument, I'm going to give you the reasons why he really never got consideration: he can't score in double figures consistently, his rebounding numbers are high because he is the only one who can rebound, defensively he is too small, and he gets way too many fouls. Aaron Gray put in his ten points pretty much night in and night out. He also could go for 16+ as frequently as Blair. He was a solid rebounder. The reason his numbers weren't that great(as good as Blair's) were the player rebounding around him. Levon Kendall, Troutman, Jaron Brown, Mike Cook, Levance Fields, all of these guys are great rebounders. On defense, Gray was sort of a stiff, but his size still would scare people away from the post, forcing outside shots. Gray also didn't get 2 fouls in 2 minutes in every road game. Sidenote: About rebounding, in the last X amount of games this season, I bet Levance Fields is 2nd in rebounding in at least one or two of them. Since Young doesn't board, Keith doesn't board, and Gil and Tyrell "back to Littles on the Floss" Biggs won't get minutes.

WINNER: AARON GRAY

6TH MAN: Another position where you could go any which way. For leadership, Knight is playing all 40 at the point. Page is playing all 40 for defense. Brown is playing all 40 because he is a pimp. So basically the 6th man needs to be a versatile 4 or 5. I think Tyrell Biggs would fit perfectly in this role...hahahahahahahaha. I just hate him that much. Or we could go with a shooter like Ronald Ramon...hahahahaha. Ditto. The 6th man spot came down to two players, Sam "I AM" Young and Chevy Troutman. I could give you all of their positives again, but I am going to sum this argument up quickly. Do you remember Sam Young bitching about coming off the bench last year? Do you remember Chevy Troutman winning the 6th man of the year award? Chevy would be honored to be the 6th man, Sam would be insulted.

WINNER: CHEVON TROUTMAN

The Squad looks like this:
PG: BRANDIN KNIGHT
SG: JULIUS PAGE
SF: JARON BROWN
PF: CHRIS TAFT
C: AARON GRAY
6TH: CHEVON TROUTMAN

This is the Floss' squad. I think we could go far into the tourney with this team. Feel free to post your all-time(er sort of) Pitt team.

IN FEELING A RUN TO THE BIG EAST TITLE(SHHHHH)

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

SOME LOVE FOR THE 'GUINS

With the return of Sid the Kid coming in perfect time, the Pens are sitting atop the Eastern Conference and the Atlantic Division. They are currently sitting 2 points ahead of second place Montreal, who has a game in hand. They are one point up on fourth place New Jersey, who also has a game in hand. Basically nothing is certain other than the 'Guins having 14 HUGE games left to play. Last nights win was one of those games seen in every sport where the better team gets the win but does it ugly, getting all the little breaks and making plays when it counts. The Pens were playing the last place team in the East, and they were outplayed and outshot 35 to 22. They found a way to win though. The Pens only had 3 Power Plays all gay netting no goals. The game winner was scored by Max Talbot(no more Maxime according to Danny Potash). Max was playing on the 2nd line with Sid and Pascal Dupuis(gay yet awesome hockey name). It was a big goal for Talbot because he scored it crashing the net on a play set up by Crosby. Talbot's role if he continues to play on Sid's line is to crash the net and get garbage goals. He needs to be a clone of Ryan Malone on the 2 line for now until at least Sid starts heading the first line with Malone and Hossa. Hossa needs to hustle back into the lineup because the Pens are going to need some continuity with their top two lines come playoff time. However, the big thing to take away from last nights game was the play of Marc Andre Fleury(Note: The Floss will never refer to him as "Flower" because it is a real gay name that shouldn't label a hockey player). He saved all 35 shots last night getting him his first shutout since the injury. The Pens have two BIG questions they need to answer in these last 14 games. Michel Thierren needs tofind out what his 3 lines will be for the playoffs? He must also decide, Fleury or Conklin, or both? Personally, the Floss likes to ride the hot goaltender, but is Fleury healthy enough to play the majority of the games remaining and be able to continue deep into the playoffs? Conklin had struggled in his last few starts, but he is a huge reason the Pens did so well without Crosby. Conklin only has played in one playoff game in his career, and Fleury has only played five. The play of these goaltenders will determine the Pens fate. Until then the Floss is just ridin' the 'Guins wave all the way to Lord Stanley's Cup.

MELTDOWN IN MO-TOWN

The Panthers folded in Morgantown Monday night as the Floss predicted. Joe Alexander played like Larry effin Bird which definitely didn't help the Panthers. Alex Ruoff hit threes like they were going out of style as anyone would expect in a rivalry game at home. The rest of the Mountainqueers also had a good game. The referrees were awful, calling fouls any time a Pitt player breathed near a Mountaineer. Some very shaky calls hurt the Panthers in the game. The Floss is not worried at all about this loss. These things happen to not so great teams, which sadly the Panthers are right now. However, if you would have said the Panthers would go 3-1 in their last 4 I would have been very pumped. A win over Depaul Sunday will make that 3-1 dream come true. They will not lose this game, in the Floss' opinion. 22-9 would be the Panthers final record, which even with a first round loss in the BE Tourney still gets them dancin' in the Big Dance. Even losing their next two will get them in. With the injury troubles this season, no one can blame Jamie Dixon for the job he has done with this team. I'm just ready for a run in New York next week. PITT OWNS MADISON SQUARE GARDEN.

BULLSHIT-LICIOUS

At least we all can stop watching CW's "Girlicious", since Murrysville's Sweethear(bigger than you now DROF, sorry) has been eliminated. The show had it out for her the whole time. She knew it too. She pointed out that she was looked down upon because she was in college. It wasn't her fault. Honestly, the show kept on the wheelchair girl who looks like a linebacker. They kept on Illisa, who looks like an offensive guard with red hair. Honestly, think Alan Faneca. They still have some hotties left for the show, but it might be the worst reality show since "That's Amore" Sunday night. I'm going to pay attention to who wins this show, hoping that Natalie, Nichole, and Jamie can all form a new sexy girl band that DROF can listen to from across the hall.


Sidenote to COF: The drunk blog from the "Floss Files" as you called it never happened. I was going to drunk blog on DROF's computer(Floss' was off), but if you know anything about his laptop, you know that the "i" key is broke. It makes it nearly impossible to blog. So the "Floss Files" are just a rumor.

Happy Birthday to PnR. He did 18 shots in an hour at Peter's last night and proceeded to turn my bathroom to a warzone. It's time for Spring Break, Floss is getting his sauce on tonight. Lets get drunk.

Monday, March 3, 2008

MONDAY RAMBLINGS

An interesting weekend made a blog today nearly impossible to accomplish. I woke up this morning hurting more than a boxer after a fight. Another hard drinking weekend combined with one of the more interesting diner trips I've made in a while. The Floss may have ordered the best/worst combo plate of food ever. The order: Peanut Butter Pancakes(unreal first time ever for Floss), Sausage patties, and some onion rings. Did I mention the appetizer of pierogies soaked in butter and hot sauce? The next morning I was lucky enough to have no TUMS left in my top drawer thanks to PnR. The ride home from Ritter's diner was an interesting one for DROF, B-Man, and myself. We made the great decision to hitchike home with a man who tried to sell us weed. "Nah dude, this guys legit, he's got a carseat, we're straight"--DROF as we enter the car. I think we were okay because he figured that one of us would B packing heat. No blog was going to happen today, until when I woke up this morning and saw the good news. Ah, the GOOD NEWS.

ROONEY'S BREAK THE BANK FOR BEN

Only 5 days after the death of Myron Cope, the Rooney's decided to lock up a current legend for Steeler Nation. Ben cracked the 100 million dollar QB club with his new 8 year 102 million dollar deal. The others in the club are Peyton Manning, Carson Palmer, Brett Favre, Donovan McNabb, and Michael Vick. Since only one of these QB's is currently better than Ben, I would say the Steelers got a deal. "This is about being a Pittsburgh Steeler for as long as I can be. I love Pittsburgh,"--Roethlisberger. When the Steelers drafted him in 2004, the Floss predicted 4 Super Bowls from Ben during his career. I am still sticking to my prediction. I don't know if 3 in 8 years is asking too much, but let's look at Ben's record. By the Floss' unofficial tally, I have Ben with a career 39-16 record in the regular season, 71% winning percentage or an average of 11-5 every year. I can take that from my signal caller. In the post-season Ben is 5-2 with a win in the Super Bowl. For his career he has a passer rating of 92.5, while last year he clocked in at 104.1, good for 3rd in the NFL. Ben said he wants to be a Marino or Elway and play his whole career with one team. Last night, the Rooney's made this happen for him. The Floss considered his Steeler Fandom to have started with the loss to San Diego in the 1994 AFC Championship game. So that means I have been a fan for 13 years goin' on forever. Here are the QB's that the Floss has been not so fortunate to watch blow the Steelers great seasons year in and year out: Neil O'Donnel, Mike Tomczak, Kordell Stewart, Jim Miller, Kent Graham, Tommy Maddox, Charlie Batch, and finally Ben Roethlisberger. Ben deserves this money, look at that list, honestly would you give any of those guys even a Canadian quarter to lead a team?

13-9, 55-54, ?

I know there were Olympic sports and women's sports that occured in the rivalry since the Backyard Brawl on December 1, but those haven't mattered. The rivalry has really heated up because of the way Pitt crushed the 'Eers dream in football. If Pitt gets a win tonight on WVU's Senior Night again, just WOW. I would love for us to shatter dreams again. Pitt would really hurt their tourney chance with a win tonight(Pitt W or no, I still think WVU gets in). I actually am not expecting a win tonight from the Panthers. Saturday took a lot out of this team emotionally. The good news, tonight's a rivalry game, Pitt will be able to get up for this game. Tonight has big time tourney seeding implications for the Panthers as well as morale booster. The 'Cuse win was AMAZING for this team's confidence. A win in Morganhole tonight would let Pitt go into the BE and NCAA tourney on fire. Let's get it done Panthers. Floss still sees a loss.

WVU 77
PITT 67

ROL-SUPER 6

Currently, I am giving myself 2 pats on the back for guessing who would get eliminated on ROL 2 weeks in a row. I predicted the old hags would go. Last week I said that the Love-Bus(Inna) was running out of gas. Guess what? She's in the garage. Last nights episode was rather boring. It was very well noticed by the AOF(apartment of Floss) that Bret didn't even kiss a girl last night. Honestly, PDA was at an all-time low. It was just a weird episode.
Random Thoughts from the Episode:
--Megan was the hottest hula-hooper on Earth, no doubt
--Jessica was the 2nd hottest hula-hooper on Earth
--Inna has huge boobs, but it was also noted that she is a combo DE/OLB prospect for the Pittsburgh Passion
--Destiney is climbing back up near her number one spot on the Floss' Power Rankings(not til next week)
--Ambre was impressive last night tap-dancing, and performed well in her number one spot
--Kristy Joe looked like a witch at elimination last night. Really a witch. However, her witch look is still better than when she doesn't put on makeup. Woof.
--Daisy was up and down on the show. He good was that she actually could read the challenge note from Bret. I didn't think she could read. She forgot the words to the National Anthem, but I expected that.
--I expect Kristy Joe to get the boot next week. Her craziness is too much at this point. See if the Floss can go 3 for 3.

3 LINKS FOR THE FANS(ALL WORKSAFE)

1. http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/080228&sportCat=nba
This is a sad story about the Seattle Sonics leaving town. And it is from the Floss' favorite writer Bill Simmons.

2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84_QL1kEmH4 Silly Asians. This video rules. DROF you must see this.

3. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PsB8HuRLiA The Rockets have won 15 straight. This guy gets a big loss and should be an instant YouTube star. Notice T-Mac laughing and the guy getting a beer immediately handed to him when he leaves the court.

A little under 2 hours til tipoff. GO HOME MOUNTAINQUEERS. YOU SUCK.