2 HELPINGS OF RANT--THANKSGIVING EDITION

Holiday issues coupled with the lackluster computer in the home of the Floss, there will probably be no updates until around next Monday. The Floss says sorry for that. Here are 2 rants courtesy of the Floss, both relating to Turkey Day:

"HAPPY T-GIVING TO U AND UR FAMILY"

What's this you ask? O, u all no, it's a tm wishing u a happy holiday. I hate the mass texts that swirl around on holidays. If you are going to waste time to send a text, personalize the damn thing. The mass text on holidays is like the "hey, we haven't talked in between 6 and 12 months, but just so you know I care enough about you to check the box next to your contact info, take care". Seriously, the mass texts on holidays are sooooooooooo wizzzzeeak. The Floss bets if you all think about it, you can think already about the people who will send you one. However, there are always those people that you definitely didn't expect probably because they are the ones with a send all button. Not too mention, it is almost guaranteed that on one of the MMTH(Major Mass Text Holidays), you will receive a MTM(Mass Text Message) from a number you don't even have. The Floss sees 2 possible solutions to this MTM problem:

1. Prank Mass Texts. Get a list of all the people that you were going to send a TM to on an MMTH and change what you were going to say to something funny like, "balls on your chin". Not only will this confuse people, but they will just know to not MTM you ever again.

2. Change the MMTH around. Stop on the important holidays. The Floss thinks if you really want to wish someone a happy holiday, you might as well personalize the text. Let's just change the MMTH around to some more fun times. Some examples, Cinco de Mayo, MLK Day, any anniversary of a Steelers' Super Bowl, etc. Can you imagine a MTM for MLK Day, "Hey all, just wanted to say Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Sip some juice. Love ya, Floss". Yes We Can.

LIONS AND COWBOYS

Fuck the Lions and Cowboys. There is no reason that they should both be playing every year on Turkey Day. The Lions haven't had a meaningful week 13 game in probably 10 years. Although you could argue the Lions haven't had a meaningful game in 10 years, sans ones where they are playing for draft picks. The Cowboys are America's team, so what? Give everyone else a shot damnit. Another thing, the NFL should not allow the NFL Network to show the primetime game. Seriously, your the most successful sport in terms of popularity and revenue, stop selling your soul every fuckin' year. At least if your going to take the only decent game of the day away from the fans, pay the refs a competitive salary. This year ESPN bit them though by putting no. 2 Texas on TV at the same time. To hell with the NFL Network.

101st EDITION OF THE BACKYARD BRAWL

-No real preview of the game, last game still pisses me off.
-At least we can stop the run.
-This is the last time Pat White will play Pitt, thank god, he was one of my favorite qu'eers to watch.
-Probably Shady's last home game. It's awesome that Pitt's 2 best players in my lifetime were both prep school products. Thanks.
-The game will be a sell out, might actually have an atmosphere.
-FLOSSY PREDICTION:
PITT 24
QUEERS 14

To go back to something from yesterday, Pitt can still win 10 games this year. Do you know the last time Pitt won 10 games, 1981. The Floss wasn't even thought about in 1981. The computer wasn't even real in 1981. Do you know how many times Pitt has won 9 games since 1981, 2 FUCKING TIMES. And one of those times was 1982. In the Floss' tenure on this Earth, 1988 going forward, Pitt has won 9 games once. It was the glorious 2001-2002 season where Larry Fitz torched the Oregon St. Beavs in the Insight Bowl. Get a grip people, this is going to be the most successful year in almost 30 FUCKING years. Stop your bitching.