YOU CAN HATE ME NOW

Way too long for an update, so I hope this one will do. The Floss has been busy celebrating a huge Pitt win, battlin' a stomach flu, blacking out to an embarassing Pitt loss, crying over the AJ Alexander decommit(he's a moron FWIW), and honoring one of the other good doctors. I figure I wanted to make some BOLD statements about the current year, 2008. The Floss is big on lists and this most certainly is 2 lists. Ima break this down into the top 8 to hate and the great 8 this year. The order is most certainly descending in order of importance. I was going to go with the hate first to end on a happy note, but due to fan demands(fof), the Floss is starting good and ending mean. Strike up the band...

(Note: A lot of this list deals with sports, I apologize for the non-sport people, but eff you)

GREAT

8. Kenny Chesney: Chesney has a 10 stadium stop tour this summer again. He will be back at Heinz again. I have missed the last 2 Kenny's at Heinz. I will be attending on June 14th. Tailgating around Heinz Field is a dream. The Pirates will be worthless by June 14th. Kenny is a perfect reason for a summer tailgate. Best part of a summer tailgate, a summer cooler talk.

7. Kobe Bryant: KB24 as the Floss likes to call him is resurging basketball. I am still on the Atlanta Hawks bandwagon(first ever Floss, tear), but I am on the KB24 wagon right now. This Lakers team has a chance to win the West. Last night Kobe went 16 minutes without a shot attempt and the LakeShow was up 10+. This is the Andy Bynum-less Lakers too. Kobe is bringing the NBA back like Justin brought sexyback(no homo).

6. Will Smith: I was thinking about the last good movie I saw and I thought of I Am Legend. I thought about how I hated Will Smith in the early days of his acting career(minus Fresh Prince), now I'm very on his bandwagon. I Am Legend was awesome and so was Pursuit of Happiness. Will Smith isn't the Kobe of acting, but he is a late bloomer, see Willie Parker.

5. Brent Musberger: One of the New Years Resolutions was to not gamble on sports, but Brent might get me to break that one. He is Mr. Gamble. If you are a gambler, you can notice all of his betting innuendos throughout a broadcast. Honestly, not so much in basketball, but in college football he gives the spread within the first 10 minutes. In college basketball, lines are too close, but he loves brining up favorites and dawgs.

4. Levance Fields: Call me crazy, but this Pitt basketball team is the best team they have had. I have thought this about many a Pitt team, but I am much harder on this team than any before them. When Fields fully returns, look out Loretta, this team will be hard to stop. Write this down, Pitt will get over the Sweet 16 hump. More on this later.

3. Sidney Crosby: Haven't really talked much hockey, but the Floss is back on the Penguins bandwagon(I may have used bandwagon 10 times already). Injuries suck and with the Kid down for 6-8, many are worried about the Pens, not the Floss. Genoooooo Malkin will start to get some much needed notoriety after his All Star snub. Jordy Staal and Ryan Whitney will turn it up for this team. Again when Sid comes back, look out Loretta. The Pens will go to the Eastern Conference finals or further. Write it down. More on this again.

2. Dave Wannsteadt: Do you see a theme here? Injuries hurt. The Pitt football team had a terrible injury plague this past season, and it took them a long time to get comfortable. We have all seen the excuses, but '08 is the year. This is cliche, but Wanny finally has a team that can play a pro style offense and players that fit in his defense. Wanny is going to have a great '08, but he will also be an early hero of '09 when he wins a game in January '09. Write this down.

1. Bret Michaels: Even Bret is skeptical about finding love on this season of Rock of Love, therefore his TV career will probably continue. He has given college students around America a new show each semester, so he will be back fall '09. The girls this season are hotter and dumber than before. Can you imagine the fall '09 ladies. At this rate, we could be in for a treat. I know Bret is getting old, especially in Rock and Roll years, but I think I have a solution to the end of his Rock of Love career. VH1 will never quit airing the show, but what better job for Bret to handle at the end of his career then to take over the PlayBoy Mansion for Hef. Seriously keep talking about who is taking over for Bowden and Paterno. Who's taking over for Hef? Bret Michaels. So after Rock of Love 21, Bret gets Hef's job. Boom.

HATE

8. Jamie Lynn Spears: It isn't her fault she is in the public limelight because of her failing sister's career and her terrible mother, but it is her fault she got pregnant at 16. She was dumb in that regard. I really don't feel that bad for her because she is just another 16 year old pregnant girl. She is just going to be all over tabloids that shouldn't focus on her being the sister of a now irrelevant sister. Note: I think I am so bitter because I loved Britney especially when she was hitting me baby one more time. I think the fallout of Britney's career hurt me. I couldn't put her on this list, so eff you Jamie Lynn.

7. Terrelle Pryor: He committed to Pitt a long time ago, and thats where he should go. I am jealous of this guy's career, but I am sick of it. He ruins my days because I get to hear about rumors about him coming to Pitt. Now with Charlie Batch as his advisor, I actually think he might come to Pitt. I hate the way he handles this process. Sad fact is that if he signs with Pitt , he will move to number 1 on the Great list, and then we can just talk about national titles 365 Flossin' days a year.

6. John Kemp Starley: Who the eff is John Kemp Starley? He invented the modern bicycle. I hate bikes. They have always pissed me off. The other day I got nearly run over by a guy on a bike, then he went on the road with the cars. Really there isn't a place for bikes in this world. Mountain bikes can go in the mountains because you will never find me there unless the ghost of JK Starley comes and takes me there. Sidewalks, not Sidebikes. Walk on sidewalks people. Roads are for cars. Water is for boats. I could keep going.

5. Chris Hanson: He does do a lot of good catching pedofiles, but he could be a little more friendly. Honestly, he entraps them to catch them, so their punishments aren't harsh enough. He makes them feel like shit, but really he is the one that fucks it up. I think people might read into this the wrong way, but people get caught on his show and then they go be pedofiles again because he ruins the case against the pedofiles. It doesn't make much sense, but I just don't like him.

4. Jim Burr: Jim Burr is a reason I wouldn't want to bet again because he always seems to know the line to. He keeps games way too close to the spread. The real reason I'm worried is that he has been unkind to Pitt in the past, and he will continue to hurt the Pitt basketball team. He was pitiful in the Seton Hall game. Refs aren't supposed to be noticed, but everyone watched him invent the makeup call. The makeup call makes sense in theory, but just think once he effs up once, he must continually make bad calls in order to make them up.

3. Ryan Scheckler: He has a reality show on MTV. He is probably one of the top skaters in the World. He can basically get any girl from the ages of 16 to 22. Yet he gets a reality show to cry like a little girl about his life problems. Did I mention he is a millionaire? This kid sucks real bad. Give the Floss a show before Ryan Scheckler.

2. Hilary Clinton: I know I didn't want to pay any attention to the election, but as soon as I saw her win a state in a primary, I had to get involved. She cannot run this country. I would hate to see a woman as a president. She is fake as hell. She just stood by Bill because of this election. Apparently she won't win this election because if she was closer, more hating her would be out there. The Floss is going to Canada if this c-word wins the election, even the democratic ticket would suck.

1. Eli Manning: Just like Terrelle Pryor, he could go to the other side of this list if he wins the SuperBowl. Favre could have lost the SuperBowl, but he would have made me much more excited for the game. I have always hated Eli because he will always be compared to Big Ben. Now that he might be seen in higher regard hurts even more. I'm putting that behind me because I want the Pats and their fans to cry themselves to sleep at night. Eli won't win and that is why he made the hate list. I HATE ELI.

The Floss is too nice to end on a hateful note, so here a some pictures of this weeks Maxim cover girl, Heidi Montag.
http://www.icelebz.com/celebs/heidi_montag/